My Teen Daughter

I have a 14 year old daughter. She's very bright and doing very well in school. She's also strong minded and can be a bully to her younger siblings. My biggest issue with her is the fact that she has a tendency to justify everything that she does or does not do. She struggles at times to take any accountability for choices that she makes. Well, last weekend her and I had a conflict that really triggered my anger. I was able to walk away because of the thoughts I was having towards her, I immediately needed to back off and take a time-out. We both went to bed that night, not saying a word to one another. The next day, she went to school and I went to work. I came home from work and she greeted me with a "hello". I returned the hello with a smile and said "hello" back. I went to my room and returned back a few seconds later asking her if she felt we needed to talk. She agreed and followed me to my room. I started out the conversation of what happened the night before. I also shared with her, that I was surprised she didn't come talk to me before going to bed because she's my kid that can't go to bed upset or mad. She shared with me that she felt I was still angry and didn't feel it was a good idea for her to approach me. I continued to share with her and take accountability for my anger and apologize for allowing it to stay throughout the night. I also shared with her my concerns of her behavior in the home lately. Throughout the conversation I was able to ask her questions that would give her the opportunity to not just answer yes or no or I don't know, but actually express how she felt about what I said. I also gave myself time to really listen to her and even when she paused at times, I continued to wait on her to reply or respond. She was then able to apologize and be accountable for her behaviors that have not been reflecting the value in our home. And she ended it with, "I Love You, Mom." I was able to embrace her and share it right back. It's so important for me as a parent to continue to move forward and be able to model the example I want my children to follow. Boy, do I have days where I fall short and don't like the way I've handled things. However, I continue to practice the values I have for myself and one of those is Humility. Being able to admit when you have done something wrong and could of handled it differently is important for me to teach my kids and for them to experience. And most of all, ask for forgiveness and move forward.